"Do you have to brush teeth in heaven?"

Nicholas,

Tonight at bedtime you cried uncontrollably...really, you sobbed so much I think you were close to hyperventilating (you said, "My tummy hurts and my head feels dizzy.").

When you calmed down enough to talk, I asked why you were so sad and you replied, "I don't want Halmoni and Halabeoji [Korean words for grandparents] to die." (between sobs)

"What made you think of that? Halmoni and Halabeoji are downstairs. You know that when your body stops working is when you die? Their bodies are working fine. Why did you think about when they die?"

"I was just in my bed and I thought about it and it made me SO sad. I would miss them SO MUCH." (still crying, and snubbing, trying to get it all under control)

"It is sad to think about people dying." (teary-eyed, trying to maintain composure) "I think it makes us so sad because we miss people when they're gone and it hurts us deep inside. Did you know that when God made the first people, Adam and Eve, that he didn't want them to die? The Bible says that God wrote eternity on our hearts (Ecclesiastes 3). Do you know what eternity means?"

Shakes head, "No."

"Eternity means forever. We were made for eternity, for forever, but we can't live forever in these bodies on earth. That's why God made a plan for us to get to heaven, and why our bodies will be different then (2 Corinthians 5)."

"Can people die then?"

"Now our bodies can get hurt or sick and we get hungry and when someone's body stops working on earth they die. But the Bible says that in heaven there won't be anymore death or crying or pain."

"Mommy, can I ask you a question?"

"Sure, buddy. You can ask me anything."

"Did you feel so sad when Memaw died?"

(Now I'm crying) "Yes, I did. Because I knew I would miss her a lot. I also felt glad though, because Memaw had been so sick--not like a cold or stomach ache--but sick with cancer. She had to take a lot of medicines and so her body got weaker and hurt a lot. When she died, I knew she went to heaven and got a new body and she wouldn't hurt anymore, so even though I felt really sad, I also felt glad."

"Do we get to eat in heaven?"

"I'm not sure if our new bodies will need food like we eat here."

"But in that song we sing about a 'big, big table, with lotsa, lotsa food'."

"You're right. Jesus talked about banquets and feasts in his stories."

"Do you think there will be bubble gum and ice cream at the banquets?"

"That would be yummy, wouldn't it?"

"Do you have to brush teeth in heaven? After you eat all that sugar?"

"I don't know. Maybe Daddy does, since he knows a lot about teeth. I don't remember reading anything about toothbrushes in the Bible, so maybe not."

(Giggling) "Mommy, I'm glad we talked about this stuff. Can we pray for Halmoni and Halabeoji now?"

"Sure."

Grandparents

I was blessed to know all four of my grandparents, and to know them well. We lived within ten miles of both sets as I grew up, so we had daily or weekly interactions with them all. This week I will honor and pay tribute to them. Only one remains living, and if you asked him, he's been "nearly dead" for the better part of two decades. I want to share them with you as honestly as I am able, but I also want to be reverant in my honesty. They are each remarkable, and each less than perfect, and each well loved by many.

Mamaw
"What is a Mamaw?" a friend asked one day.

My explanation at at the time was, "My Mamaw is my grandmother on my dad's side."

It was an easy enough response, but it did not begin to explain my Mamaw.

Mamaw is popcorn balls and pecan pies.
She is patchwork quilts and homemade dolls.
Mamaw is a hug, a smile, and a tender "I love you."
She is sweet tea, fresh vegetables from the garden, fried okra, and the best Brunswick stew anywhere.
Mamaw is hot chocolate for the football games and half a stick of gum in church.
Mamaw is an open Bible on the end table.
She chases cows back into the broken pasture fence late at night, makes a pallet on the floor when you spend the night.
She gives you peanut butter and Ritz crackers.
She fixes eggs any way you want them and lets you watch "Dukes of Hazzard" and "Dallas" when your mom thinks they are silly shows.
Mamaw is mercy and forgiveness that keep you from getting a spanking on Christmas Day even though you smashed the pecans on the back porch.
Mamaw is full of love and kindness spread generously from her family and friends out into the whole world.
Mamaw is a spirit so sweet and faithful that the simple fruits of her labor will last an eternity.


My Mamaw died a little more than ten years ago. My memories of her are fond. Some days I still long to talk with her; to know how she managed having six children in seven years, a husband who had to be away for long periods due to illness, parents-in-law that she helped nurse through their final years. I think about her smile, laugh and sometimes "questionable" humor...she is the one that made anatomically correct Herschel Walker cabbage patch-like dolls for the boys in the family one Christmas in the early 1980's. She was fun-loving and sincere, always willing to help others, strong in her convictions and character, extraordinary in many ways.